Today is my Birthday. 52 revolutions around the sun. As Al Pacino said in "Scent of A Women" I am at the crossroads in my life. Not the cross roads I was at when I graduated high school. I knew what I was doing then, I was going to go jump out of airplanes. So I did for 22 years. Not the crossroads I was at when I retired from the military. I knew what I was doing then. I was getting a job and becoming successful. I think I have done that over the last 10 years as well.
No, I am at a crossroads of purpose. For a long time I have been feeling a lack of purpose. Back in the day everything I did had a purpose. We did everything like our lives depended on it. More often than not it did. Now a days I feel like I am going through the motions. Like I am just showing up an making the doughnuts. Nothing really means anything. The lack of professionalism among most of my workforce or even a shred of caring about the quality of their work is wearing me down. My outside activities where I work as a Paramedic or serve as a Reserve Law Enforcement Officer is where I feel that old sense of purpose.
However I am in a trap. Success has trapped me. To leave the current situation behind would mean a significant disruption in the life of my family. I need to find someplace where I can once again have a purpose and do things like my life depended on it.
No, I am at a crossroads of purpose. For a long time I have been feeling a lack of purpose. Back in the day everything I did had a purpose. We did everything like our lives depended on it. More often than not it did. Now a days I feel like I am going through the motions. Like I am just showing up an making the doughnuts. Nothing really means anything. The lack of professionalism among most of my workforce or even a shred of caring about the quality of their work is wearing me down. My outside activities where I work as a Paramedic or serve as a Reserve Law Enforcement Officer is where I feel that old sense of purpose.
However I am in a trap. Success has trapped me. To leave the current situation behind would mean a significant disruption in the life of my family. I need to find someplace where I can once again have a purpose and do things like my life depended on it.
